The Descendents - or - All punk sounds the same and it all sucks.

The Descendents/ALL - There is so much I could say about this band that I could probably sit here and rant for ages, but instead I'll just try and keep it straight and to the point of what makes this band incredible. I've been putting off which band to start with because frankly it's a daunting task trying to type everything out about this band I want to, so I'm just going to do the best I can after doing a 45 minute presentation on transvestites, a 10 minute presentation on the divided-self in Victorian novels, and typing a 6 page paper on the representation of Mercutio in Baz Luhrmann's "Romeo + Juliet."

When you hear the term pop-punk nowadays, you probably think of some crappy band that looks like they were put together on "Making The Band" where the members wear too much mascara and play a horribly poppy, watered down version of up-tempo rock with a bit of punk influence. Think pretty much any band on the Drive-Thru Records label.

In the late 70's/early 80's, this was not the case. The Ramones had released their self-titled album in 1976 and the Sex Pistols released "Never Mind The Bollocks, Here's the Sex Pistols" in 1977. Regardless of which band you feel "started" punk, the genre of music known as "punk" officially blossomed to the public in those two years. The aim of those bands was to play loud and fast while expressing your anger at whatever government was in control of your country at the time or the inequalities of social institutions. The music spoke to thousands of angry, angsty teenagers at the time just waiting to express their frustration. Four of these kids were Milo Aukerman, Bill Stevenson, Karl Alvarez, and Stephen Egerton.

The four high school kids, all around age 17, formed a band based around "rejection, food, coffee, girls, fishing, and food" and decided they would use music as their outlet. They eventually would become one of the best punk bands ever and release a solid list of albums as well as tours for nearly 30 years.

Ok, thanks for the biographical info (if you want to read more just check the Biography on their homepage), what makes them special? At the time when the Sex Pistols were shouting "Anarchy in the UK" and The Ramones were doing the "Bliztkrieg Bop," the Descendents took the energy of punk music and decided they didn't want to change the world, they wanted to sing about what they knew. They took the pop melodies that they liked to jam out to, the frenetic speed and energy of punk, and topped them off with lyrics full of teen angst and humor. The band wasn't a bunch of big, mohawked punk rockers with dyed green liberty spikes walking around the hall. They were the nice, quiet, nerdy guys with glasses getting A's in all their classes that would go jump around in the pit looking for a way to vent their frustrations. While most bands were writing lyrics solely to distinguish one song from the next, the Descendents were putting genuine feelings into what they were singing about.

The result is that they were one of the first "pop-punk" bands ever and released one of the greatest punk albums ever written around the time they were all 18, "Milo Goes To College."

Alright, enough of the stupid biographical information, hopefully you understand their context now, what makes me love them so much? Well, when you're a geeky, suburban, middle-class, angsty high school student that is just starting to discover punk rock and you hear a band ranting about everything you're experiencing, it's pretty easy to identify with them. Back when Napster was first developing and I was first beginning to get into punk rock, I stumbled upon the song "I'm Not A Loser." I immediately fell in love and tried to get my hands on everything that I could find. I bought "Milo Goes To College" and to this day it's still one of my favorite albums ever, the song "Bikeage" ranks as one of my top 5 songs ever. Everything I sat through in high school wishing I could rant about to the people in my school, I found The Descendents to have vocalized my frustrations not only with words, but with kickass melodic pop-punk. I spent many years catching up on the back catalogue of stuff they'd released, and then realized that they were still releasing albums. That fed me with plenty of The Descendents to keep me busy for a while, but when I had finally listened to everything, I began digging around. I then discovered that the band ALL is basically The Descendents without Milo. ALL is an excellent band, don't get me wrong, they've written a lot of incredibly good songs, but Milo just completes the quartet.

So yes, the Descendents defined a lot of my teenage years, even now when I listen to certain songs I can remember driving my '88 Toyota Corolla around my little suburban areas rocking out to this band that I felt was able to see directly into my head. The band was able to sing about how I may not be going out to a party one weekend, but it was a choice, I embraced my nerdiness; I didn't want to be one of the spoiled jerks at my school and I didn't want to associate with them. The great thing about the band, however, is that while I was growing up and graduating from high school, the guys in the band had moved past that point so I could grow up as they were growing up. As you can see in the Milo Goes To College album cover, most of the album covers feature the same structure, a cartoon sketch of Milo and the covers are incredibly simple, just the name of the band, album title, and different sketch of Milo. Some people hate it, I find it totally fitting for the band. They consistently rank as one of my favorite bands, and easily my favorite band that ranks in any band related to the "punk" category.

Now, I know many, many people hate punk rock because it all sounds the same. This is because when a band like The Descendents comes around, they influence so many people that they spawn hundreds of imitators. Then these imitators spawn imitators which are even worse and basically what you are left with is a bunch of crappy bands that have only peripherally heard the name of the band that created what they're trying to mimic. Every band that tries to play some form of pop-punk and sings about personal experience or self-deprecation, those bands a good portion to the founding fathers and pioneers of that style, The Descendents. Most people will listen to The Descendents and find them to be nothing special at all, but remember that the pop-punk you were hearing in 1998, The Descendents were doing that, except better, and 20 years ago. Now, they were widely influenced by many other bands around the time such as The Buzzcocks, but I feel that The Descendents did it best, and many other people would agree with me. I can't make the statement "The Descendents founded pop-punk," but they were some of the pioneers and were massively influential on hordes of bands.

They've got an incredibly large, solid following, if anyone says they listen to "punk" and doesn't know who The Descendents are, they probably think Blink 182's self-titled album is the best album they've ever heard and purely has bad taste therefore you should never discuss music around them again unless you're forcing them to listen to something worthwhile. The Descendents' early stuff is fairly abrasive, however, their later albums are loaded with catchy riffs that most people people can tolerate. The band is hugely influential and widely popular with anyone that listens to any form of punk rock, chances are you've heard me mention them or have heard their name in passing somehwere.

Even if you are a steady believer in hating punk rock, such as my friend Jeff, I think you should give this a spin. He heard me jamming to "Milo Goes To College" and now it has a fairly permanent spot on his iPod, or at least that's what he tells me.

I think that most people are too lazy to go look up any band I mention here and I can't possibly say enough good things about these bands. so I think it's best if people just give them a listen and decide for themselves. Anyway, since I am serious about trying to get people to listen to some of the bands I want to rant about, I figure I'll put some links up to some of my favorite songs so all you need to do to listen is to click one link.

The Descendents - ALL - Coolidge
The Descendents - Milo Goes To College - Marriage
The Descendents - Everything Sucks - Everything Sux
The Descendents - Milo Goes To College - Bikeage
ALL - Allroy Sez - Hooidge
ALL - Mass Nerder - Perfection
ALL - Allroy's Revenge - Box

(yes, there is a recurring theme of songs ending in "age" or "idge" or any suffix that produces a similar sound)

10 bands you should make sure you've heard in your life...

Let's start this off with something of a disclaimer. I listen to music. I mean, I listen to a lot of music. I listen to music pretty much any chance I get. This also means that when I discovered the internet and Napster back on my 56k in my early days of high school, I began finding all sorts of new, fun bands. This also means that whenever I mention a band I really like they've heard of them and they rarely talk about music I care about or enjoy. When I do mention a band, I get told they're too underground and no one knows about them but me, and when I criticize other people's tastes, I am an elitist. I understand I am not an authority on the subject, in fact I think anyone that considers themself an authority on music (with the exception of possibly Steve Albini) is probably a worthless shmuck.

As my collection has grown over the years, so has my quest in the world to introduce people to new music. This is not a "YOUR BAND SUCKS" post and I understand most people in the world don't really care about the music they listen to, if they did bands like The Pussycat Dolls would not exist. Ok, that was a cheap shot. I simply get some kind of sick pleasure from introducing people to new bands they really enjoy because I remember the feeling of discovering bands that eventually would become some of my favorites, hence the reason for this post. I like introducing people to new music, and as such I hope you, my faithful reader, will take the time to at least listen to one or two songs by each band I mention.

This is not a "Top 10" list, rather this is just merely a list, in absolutely no particular order, of bands that I find incredibly enjoyable and talented. It seems like everyone that I used to discuss music with now gets all their news from www.pitchforkmedia.com and takes the reviews and opinions like it's some sort of indie rock Bible. I really don't care about the latest electro-no-wave-bliss-pop-shoegaze band. I find much more enjoyment out of sifting through piles of albums that are complete dogshit and coming out with one that is an absolute diamond rather than have some pretentious jerk telling me what band I should like in order to remain "hip." But anyway, this isn't a rant about what's wrong with PFM, this is a "Hey, you guys should check these bands out because I like them a lot." I understand some of these bands won't be for everyone, and that's fine, but you should at least give them a fair shot.

The main criteria I used for this list are as follows:
1. Personal Enjoyment - obviously this should be at the top of anyone's list if they're recommending a band to someone else. If it isn't, that person is name-dropping bands to try and make them sound more musically "in-the-know" which is dumb. Own up to what you like and don't like, if you hate The Pixies it doesn't mean you're some kind of ignorant dipshit, it means that they're not your cup of tea and that's it. One of the great things about music is that you can develop your own tastes and find bands that fit them perfectly, there's never a need to settle for less. Most of these bands are bands I've listened to for years and have consistently remained in my playlist regardless of what else I've discovered.
2. Popularity - Let me explain. It won't do me any good to recommend bands people have heard of, however, some of these you probably have whether it was through me or through some other means. Anyway, some of these bands do have large followings wherever they go, but most have remained on independent labels and mostly under the radar for as long as they've been around. I am also taking into account their popular appeal to people that generally don't listen to whatever genre the band may belong too or have possibly never even heard of the genre. Obviously, while I may like a band such as The Locust, I'm not going to find many people going "Hey man, remember when you recommended me those guys that were screaming at me and sounded like complete chaos, something similar to a train hitting a bus full of screaming babies while the guy from Casio was making his first keyboard? They'll fit in totally awesome next to my Green Day albums." I'm trying to recommend bands I think people may enjoy that aren't drastically different from what they may have heard, however, if you want some bands that the order of the day is abrasiveness, feel free to let me know and I can recommend plenty.
3. Context - Bands that have a significant impact in their genre or musical scene at the time almost always have a reason for that impact. I can't count the number of times I've heard a band and gone "Hey, band X sounds like band Y and I've listened to and liked band Y for a long time" then find out band X came first. Almost always, this results in me listening to band X and realizing that band Y is just a watered down knock off of band X. This then results in me listening to band X, enjoying band X even more than I enjoyed band Y, and finally understanding why they made such a big influence.


So now that my disclaimer is out of the way, I will begin with the bands shortly. Feel free to post comments and opinions on my own feelings of music or opinions on the bands. I always enjoy a solid discussion of music, however, be aware that once you start a conversation with me about music it will probably go on longer than you planned.

(ps. this post may or may not be disjointed because for some reason I could only sleep for 4 hours last night and woke up hungover. I think you can make sense out of it though.)